Are you and I in a survival - based life? How can we tell?

Listen for an "or else."

I have to - or else. I need to - or else.
We should- or else. You must - or else.

We experience, perceive some form of threat to our existence.W8e tend to react, respond with an "or else."

"I have to" - or else (I will die), You need to - or else (our marriage will end), We should- or else (our nation will fail).

We go from fear to anxiety, forever encountering life with a never-ending sense if insecurity..
Ultimately a depressing, life-sucking existence.

And yet,
Feel the shift in our life experience when we change one single vowel, from an "o" to an "e" transforming a "Got to" (or else) life, to a "Get to" life.

Changing, "I have to," to "I get to."
Changing, "We should" to "We get to."

I invite us to try it out for ourselves.
What are your three favorite "have tos?"
Say them as "Get tos" and feel the difference.

What would your life be like it you went from an "or else" life to a "Get to" life?

No safety. No marriage.

Least understood, and what most men are completely unaware of - is that there's no place on earth where any woman will feel safe.

Nor is there any evidence that she ought to feel safe.
Half of humankind has no reason to feel safe.

She parks her car in brightly lit spaces, looks into the rear seat of her car before she gets in - for safety. She carries a key between her fist for a weapon - for safety. She checks the doors and windows to make sure they are locked each night - for safety. She goes to the bathroom in restaurants and schools in pairs - for safety.

If she cannot feel safe around you, you will not get a second date. When she begins to feel unsafe with you, she will begin to pull away for her safety.
When she can no longer trust or feel safe around you, your marriage is over.

Are you, I, and our marriage living a survival-based life? How can we tell?

Listen for an "or else."

I have to - or else. I need to - or else.
We should- or else. You must - or else.

We experience, perceive some form of threat to our existence.We tend to react, respond with an "or else."
"I have to" - or else (I will die), You need to - or else (our marriage will end), We should- or else (our nation will fail).
We go from fear to anxiety, forever encountering life with a never-ending sense if insecurity..
Ultimately a depressing, life-sucking existence.
And yet,
Feel the shift in our life experience when we change one single vowel, from an "o" to an "e" transforming a "Got to" (or else) life, to a "Get to" life.
Changing, "I have to," to "I get to."
Changing, "We should" to "We get to."

I invite us to try it out for ourselves.
What are your three favorite "have tos?"
Say them as "Get tos" and feel the difference.

What would your life be like if you and I went from an "or else" life to a "Get to" life?
Try it out - where the rubber meets the road - your life.

Distinguish your:

"Have tos. Need tos, Got tos. Shoulds, Oughts, and Musts."
See what happens when you restate them as "Get tos."
There is no past in "Get tos."
Only forward. possibility given life.